Previous England skipper Lewis Moody has disclosed he has been found to have motor neurone disease and stated he cannot yet face the full ramifications of the muscle-wasting condition that took the lives of fellow rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The 47-year-old, who was involved in the 2003 Rugby World Cup-winning side and lifted multiple English and European titles with Leicester, appeared on BBC Breakfast two weeks after discovering he has the condition.
"There's something about confronting what lies ahead and not wanting to fully comprehend that at the minute," he commented.
"This doesn't mean I fail to comprehend where it's heading. We grasp that. But there is definitely a unwillingness to face what's ahead for now."
Moody, speaking alongside his wife Annie, explains conversely he feels "at ease" as he focuses on his present wellbeing, his family and planning ahead for when the illness deteriorates.
"Maybe that's shock or possibly I deal with matters in another way, and when I have the facts, it's simpler," he continued.
Initial Indications
Moody discovered he had MND after noticing some lack of strength in his shoulder while exercising in the gym.
After physical therapy failed to improve the issue, a series of scans showed neural pathways in his brain and spinal cord had been damaged by MND.
"You receive this diagnosis of MND and we're understandably very moved about it, but it's rather peculiar because I feel like I'm perfectly healthy," he remarked.
"I don't feel sick. I don't feel sick
"My indications are very minor. I have a bit of muscle loss in the fingers and the shoulder.
"I continue to be competent to accomplishing whatever I want. And optimistically that will carry on for as long as is possible."
Illness Development
MND can develop swiftly.
According to the organization MND Association, the illness kills a 33% of people within a 365 days and above half within 730 days of identification, as ingestion and respiration become increasingly challenging.
Medical care can only delay worsening.
"It's never me that I am upset for," added an emotional Moody.
"It's the grief around having to tell my mum - as an sole offspring - and the implications that has for her."
Household Consequences
Talking from the residence with his wife and their pet dog by his side, Moody was consumed with feeling when he mentioned breaking the news to his sons - 17-year Dylan and adolescent Ethan - the heartbreaking news, commenting: "This was the most difficult thing I've ever had to do."
"These are two wonderful boys and that was rather heartbreaking," Moody stated.
"We sat on the settee in crying, Ethan and Dylan both wrapped up in each other, then the dog leapt across and commenced cleaning the moisture off our faces, which was somewhat silly."
Moody stated the focus was remaining in the present.
"We have no treatment and that is why you have to be so intensely focused on just welcoming and savoring each moment now," he commented.
"According to Annie, we've been very blessed that the only real decision I made when I retired from playing was to devote as much time with the kids as feasible. We won't recover those times back."
Sportsman Link
Professional athletes are excessively influenced by MND, with research indicating the incidence of the condition is up to six times greater than in the broader public.
It is considered that by reducing the O2 accessible and creating harm to nerve cells, consistent, strenuous physical activity can initiate the disease in those inherently predisposed.
Rugby Career
Moody, who won 71 England appearances and toured with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was dubbed 'Mad Dog' during his sports career, in honour of his fearless, unwavering style to the game.
He competed through a bone injury of his leg for a duration with Leicester and once initiated a workout scuffle with team-mate and friend Martin Johnson when, annoyed, he abandoned a practice gear and commenced participating in physical contacts.
After entering as a substitute in the Rugby World Cup decisive match win over Australia in 2003, he won a ball at the back of the set piece in the decisive moment of play, setting a foundation for playmaker Matt Dawson to advance and Jonny Wilkinson to kick the match-winning drop-goal.
Assistance Network
Moody has earlier told Johnson, who led England to that title, and a couple of other former team-mates about his condition, but the rest will be finding out his news with the remainder of public.
"We'll have a time when we'll need to depend on their support but, at the minute, just having that kind of affection and acknowledgment that people are there is what's important," he said.
"The sport is such a excellent community.
"I mentioned to the kids the other day, I've had an incredible life.
"Even should it finished now, I've enjoyed all of it and accepted all of it and got to do it with unbelievable people.
"Being able to call your passion your career, it's one of the most important honors.
"Achieving this for so long a time with the teams that I did it with was a joy. And I know they will want to help in every way they can and I anticipate having those conversations."
